Last night I was clicking around on the Internet and ran into a couple of things that really depressed me, and let me preface this with saying that I was in a bit of a mood last night anyway. I think with weight loss it is normal to go through phases of feeling very motivated, and then feeling not so motivated. Last night was a not so motivated night. I had eaten dinner, and I had my nightly ice cream, and I was still hungry....well that probably isn't true, I wasn't actually hungry, but I WANTED to eat. I was going through my normal blog reading routine when I ran into something that really just pissed me off.
I often read the new Bodies in Motivation site started by Linda of All & Sundry. I really like the site and find the blogs, and the tips to be helpful and motivating. One of the blogs I read last night linked to the site Shapely Prose. In theory I like the idea of the blog being, from what little I know about it, fat acceptance. BUT the thing that was really bugging me is there is several articles that the gist seems to be don't bother dieting or trying to incorporate a lifestyle change because you are just going to get fat again.
I started getting really angry and frustrated while looking through the blog. I was wondering why I am even bothering to lose weight if it is inevitable that I am going to gain it all back. I was thinking about my new diet/fitness routine and wondering if I would be able to keep it up for the REST OF MY LIFE. The site tends to suggest I can not. I really wanted to go and eat all the Girl Scout cookie ice cream in the freezer and wash it down with a bag of pretzels and maybe a cookie. I was really angry that the website even existed, it seemed to be a big (fat) excuse to not even try to get healthy, although they claim it is dedicated to being healthy at any size. I was getting defensive like the whole site was invented just to say "Why bother Penny, you will always be a fatass!" I don't know, I was feeling emotional and a little snippy at the time so maybe it deserves a reread in the light of day...
I still do not know what the answer is, but I am proud that I stayed on my plan and did not binge last night like I wanted to. I have eaten a good breakfast this morning, and plan on going for a jog tonight, but I still wonder if it is all pointless and I'm just going to end up fatter?
About Me
- Penny
- I work. I have a toddler named Eli(born August 2006). I have a dog and two cats and one husband (Teddy). I like to write about mothering, marriage, crafting, and my general opinion on things. I used to have another blog, but I was too liberal with my personal information and got creeped out. I hope to have a permanent home here! I have been on a weight loss journey since May 2008 and I tend to write a lot about my struggles with that. My family just moved from NJ to AL and I'm currently working, but I'm still looking...
4 comments:
Chalk it all up to a lull in motivation. I know lots of people who lose weight and keep it off. You will be one of those people, too. Good for you for not giving in last night and for doing so well today!
How's that paper chain coming?
Man, I need to NOT read that right now. I had WAY too many points last night going to the new bar, but I journaled them all, and will work to get more APs to get out of the red.
I read somewhere that only a small percentage of people who lose weight keep the weight off. I think that is where the WeightWatchers stuff comes into play. This is not a binge diet, the weight comes off, but slowly. Hopefully in a way that we can sustain for life.
So far I have gotten fatter every time, but I just CAN'T do that again. This has to be for life. I like the exercise...I can see keeping with it. The food is better, and one "binge" a week (with the weeklies) seems reasonable.
My guess is that you will keep it off. You might go up and down a bit from time to time, but that's normal for all women. You seem pretty determined and focused... I think someone once said, "Character is destiny." Or something like that. You have what it takes - if anyone does.
And, really, why bother with anything? Why bother trying to put a cute outfit together? Or learning to knit? Or trying to meet new people? Things don't always go as planned, but you are so much better off for having tried.
That's what I think.
I also think that what you've accomlished so far is truly inspiring. Ignore the naysayers!
Rebecca
I agree with Rebecca. In grad school I gained weight, then lost and kept it off for the past 3 years (even with 2 pregnancies). Am I always good? Hell no. I have learned to eat a little better and exercise which have become part of my lifestyle now and the weight has stayed off. I still have a long way to go (especially the eating part), but you can keep it off even with small changes over time.
Post a Comment