Tuesday, April 14, 2009

all because I thought her pants were funny

  • Today I was walking down the street and saw a fairly large women wearing a pair of stretch pants and pushing a stroller. Her stretch pants said "baby girl" across the ass. I don't get it. I guess it would make sense if it was on her stomach AND she was pregnant, but on her ass? Is her ass pregnant with a smaller ass? I decided I was going to get a pair of stretch pants and then some iron on letters, and put "something stupid" on my ass.
  • That reminded me of a time several years ago when Teddy and I went to Florida to visit my dad, and my sister and her family. We were staying in an apartment my dad rented for the summer and this bizarre woman who lived in the same apartment complex was having a big party for her 30th birthday. She went out to celebrate and got a tattoo of a daiquiri spilling on the number 30. It was the most hilarious tattoo I have ever seen in person and my sister and I had to totally keep our shit together to not laugh in that ladies face. As Teddy would say "bless her heart" which is what he says instead of "stupid idiot" because he is from the South and polite.
  • That story reminds me of a story from several years ago before Eli was on the scene. Teddy and I went to a bar to have a few drinks and after having several beers I told Teddy I thought we should go get each others names tattooed on ourselves. He readily agreed and off we went. He got my name tattooed on his bicep... and then I refused...Oh I laughed and laughed and laughed...I'm a bitch. I still laugh when I tell that story.

5 comments:

Hotch Potchery said...

OH MY GOD. I laughed at the daiquiri spilling on 30. That was so awesome. Her husband was like Lurch, then they took my kids in a limo? That was weird.

I also like that the woman wasn't just bizarre, but more like a flea market (bazaar).

Penny said...

Ha ha ha, I kept looking at that and thinking it looked weird but spellcheck said it was spelled correctly so I left it.

DAVs said...

OK...do you watch Seinfeld? There was the time when Elaine says the phrase "And I laughed and I laughed." and that is completely how I imagined you saying that about the tattoo.
And I laughed and I laughed at that story.

In the words of Teddy, bless his heart because he wound up with the tattoo and you didn't!

Not Your Aunt B said...

Your stories crack me up. I would have died snickering if I saw that on her ass. And I totally want to see a photo of you with "something stupid" on your ass.

That tattoo is funny. It made me laugh out loud. It takes the cake of all the tattoo stories for how retarded it is and I have seen my share of retarded tattoos. What's she gonna say about it when she's 80? Ha!

That's rich that Teddy has your name tattooed on his bicep. It just means that if anyone on your list ever asked you to tattoo their name you technically still could as Teddy's isn't on your body. Poor Teddy though, he's stuck ;P

creative kerfuffle said...

dude i can't believe you left teddy hanging after he went under the needles to get your name on him! wow. : ) and that ladies tattoo sounds hysterical, pathetic, but hysterical.