budget schmudget

One of the things we knew was a possibility when were discussing Teddy going back to school was that we may have less money. This has turned out to be a reality that I am really not doing well with. I think I convinced myself that the cost of living in Alabama would be SO much cheaper than in NJ it would all sort of even out.

Welllllll this does not seem to be working out for me, even though the cost of living IS cheaper here, I am making MUCH less and Teddy is only working part time. I am bitter and sort of in denial about the whole thing and I'm really going to have to get a grip. I feel like EVERYONE has more money than I (we)do and I'm just angry and jealous about it. We need to cut our eating out budget to only once a week, and I really need to work on my grocery bill. We are spending about 120-175 on groceries a week for a family of three. This seems like a lot to me. I buy mostly organic/natural products and that really drives the bill up. Does anyone have any advice on this? Does that number seem high to you?

I am angry we are going backwards in our life...It seems you should make more money over time, not less. I get that a lot of people are going through this same thing right now, I'm just saying I'm having a hard time with it. I really resent giving up lattes, and crappy doo-dads at Target. I want to be able to buy a 20$ shirt at Old Navy if I like it, but the reality is I just can't. I need to focus on the positive things in life and yet I'm pouting over not being able to go out and get coffee and frozen yogurt if I want to.

I will say that the time with our family has been great, so even knowing what I know now I would still choose to move here but, dammit I wish I could catch a break in this horrible job market and get something that paid a little more than Jesus crap fuck nothing. I'm just a little angry right now.

weekend round up

Friday: SNOWPOCOLYPSE!

OK, for Alabama it really was a lot of snow.

Saturday: Two 5Ks on the same day!

The first 5K went right in front of our house. My time was 28:58.

The second 5K I actually did a tiny bit better, 28:48.

Sunday: Hugs, Kisses, and Susie came to live with us.

We are all still missing our dog, so we went out and adopted some .13 feeder fish. We love them very much and their names are Hugs, Kisses, and Susie. Teddy bought me that little fish tank for our very first Valentine's Day together (10 years ago)! This is the first time we've gotten it out in several years and we are all really enjoying the fish (please don't die).

(please don't judge my entirely paneled, very 60s kitchen...)

thoughts before EXTREME SNOW 2010

• I love blogs, and I love to read people's blogs and really I like to read about just about anything, food, kids, trying to have kids, trying not to have kids, working, not working, eating or not eating, exercising, pets, complaining..really whatever, but I can not stand to read about when people or their kids get the barfing flu. It just makes me feel like my skin is going to scritchy scratch right off and I have to click away really fast. I have this really irrational fear that reading about someone else's barfing flu is going to make ME have the barfing flu and really? to me? Worst.thing.ever. Worrying about getting the barfing flu keeps me up at night, now I'm afraid all this talking about the barfing flu is going to jinx me. Must stop.
• Have you seen that commercial for I Can't Believe it's Not Butter with Megan Mullally? It is the one where she sings Turn the Tub Around? Well anyway inexplicably for the last SEVERAL nights me and Teddy have gotten into conversations about better fake butter song combinations and so far my favorite is spray on spray on butter (you have to sing it to the Beach Boys Sail on Sailor tune) Ugh, never mind this probably makes absolutely no sense to you.
• It may or may not snow up to 2 inches tomorrow and people are losing their minds (remember I live in Alabama). OMG SNOWPOCOLYPSE we are all going to DIE BUY water and peanut butter in bulk!
• When our dog died I SWORE I would NEVER EVER in my WHOLE life get another dog because it is just too.hard. BUT Eli is already asking about getting another dog and I've already consented too "maybe in a couple of years." AHHH how fast NEVER turned into "maybe."
• I don't get why people don't like Valentine's Day. I mean I guess I get why single people don't like it, but even then I just used it as an excuse to eat cookie dough and watch sappy movies but I really don't get why people who are part of a couple don't like it. I mean I know it is a made up consumer holiday, but who cares? It is fun and you might get some candy, what's so wrong with that?

Blogoversary.

Today is the one year anniversary of when I started THIS blog because THAT blog got hijacked by creepy stalker. I love having a blog and I love having my tiny community of friends that come by and cheer me on, or come by and offer support, because to me, that is what it is all about. I read on a friend's blog recently that there has been some competition in the "pain Olympics" and I'm always afraid when I post something that someone is going to come around and tell me to stop my whiny whining because there are hungry kids in Ethiopia or something but you guys never do that and really you are all just lovely and I want to give you a big hug.

Since I've started this blog I've taken up running, Teddy got into the PhD program, we moved, my baby turned three, I was job searching, I got a job and I'm still job searching, my dog died, and I've committed to wearing a bikini for the first time ever! There has been lots of great times, and also lots of challenges, I'm sure life will continue much the same BUT it is nicer knowing you guys will come by and check on us.

In completely unrelated and unabashed parental gloating when I dropped Eli off at daycare this morning his teacher told me that Eli is by far the brightest child in her class. It made me ridiculously proud (although I will admit the other kids are sort of dufusy so I'm not sure this is a HUGE compliment).

I ran a 10K this Saturday (my time was 1:03 so I did not hit my NYR goal, BUT the last MILE was uphill so it was still pretty awesome time) and a 5K on Sunday. I feel awesome and my sister and BIL were right there with me so they are awesome too. We are doing two 5Ks next weekend on the same day! My friend said we need "runners anonymous" but it really is fun!

NYR progress

That's my New Year's Resolution progress to those of you not in the know. I really FEEL committed to my NYRs but that doesn't seem to really be helping me actually DO anything about them. Let's remind ourselves what my resolutions are:

1. Run a half marathon
Um, nope. I still haven't found one I want to sign up for
2. Finish a 10K in less than 60 minutes
Nope. I have a 10K tomorrow but I hear it is a killer so I'm sort of assuming this is not going to be the one.
3. Finish a 5K in less than 30 minutes
I DID THIS ONE. I ran a 5K on 1/23/10 in 29:23, go me!
4. Wear a bikini on the beach (for the first time EVER) on our 10 year anniversary (August 2010), and look good doing it.
OK, I BOUGHT a bikini but that is the only thing I've done so far. I seriously need to start toning if I plan on wearing a bikini without DYING of embarrassment.
5. Take a yoga class
Nope. They are so expensive.
6. Start knitting again, and at least make some more coffee cup cozies.
Once a week I think about getting my knitting out, and it still hasn't happened.
7. Say "yes" more
I'm doing pretty good at this. I say "yes" to Eli much more about reading stories and playing games (I'm a horrible mother because I don't really enjoy these things. I hate to hear myself read out loud and Eli is super annoying to play games with but it has gotten more enjoyable the more I make myself do it)
8. teach Eli to swim
Nope
9. Play in the Gulf of Mexico with Eli and Teddy
hopefully this summer!
10. Have more sex
NOPE, I think if it is possible we are having less sex, which totally sucks but it seems like by the time there is opportunity we are both so exhausted we discuss it and then toss that option out and go to sleep instead.

OK, so now that I'm thinking about it I got 1/10 completed and I still have almost 11 months to do the other 9 so maybe I'll actually do it! How are your resolutions going?

Moving on

I just have to write a new post because every time I click on my blog and see my dog it makes me so sad. I need the page to move down but I really have nothing to say, so let's talk about some stuff I am into right now.

• LOST. I am super happy LOST is coming back on tonight. Oh, I just love Jack so much and I love his super angsty bossy pants attitude. I hope he is shirtless and sweaty for most of the evening.
• TCBY yogurt. I got a gift certificate to TCBY yogurt for Christmas and I can not get enough sugar free frozen yogurt, it makes me so happy.
• Pizza with tofu and broccoli. I know it sounds weird but it is so, so good and I can pretend it is a WHOLE meal on a pizza and HEALTHY because BROCCOLI!
• Diet Dr. Pepper. It is really so delicious and spicy, I must limit myself to one a day.
• Modern Family. Have you guys seen this? It is really funny and it always makes me happy.

Things I don't want to talk about:

• That my gas bill is 500$ for last month! What the holy hell? I didn't pay that much in NJ!
• That I am still looking for another job
• My mom moved back to Virginia to work (only until April) after living here for only three months. Our relationship still sucks.
• I feel fat
• and bloated
• and ugly
• and pimply
• I wonder why?