Thursday, October 22, 2009


If you read my sister's blog you know my mom moved to the town that we live last Friday. If you have read my blog for any amount of time you know my mom is a complete wack a doodle. I really believe my mom has a personality disorder, which means she is really, really irritating.

Having worked in the mental health profession for the last 9 years or so I can tell you that any therapist, or counselor or whoever, hates working with personality disorders because they are typically difficult people to deal with and unlike someone who has say, has an anxiety disorder, they don't think there is anything wrong with them.

My mom really believes that the most mundane details of her life should be extremely interesting to you and she will take 30 minutes to tell you a detailed story about how, for example she went to Wal-Mart to buy an ironing board, AND she will tell the story over and over and over and over and over. I'm not sure if all the drinking she did affected her memory so maybe she forgot she told you the story the first elebenty billion times BUT even if you tell her you already heard the story she will continue to tell it to you, without leaving out any of the details.

I am really trying to give her a break because I know at this point she is trying to do the right thing, but damn the women makes me crazy. Teddy and I took her to the grocery store last weekend and I am STILL annoyed at what she bought. I know that a normal person could care less about what some other person chooses to buy at the grocery store but I have spent almost a week being annoyed. She had absolutely no food in her house and she bought a pack of generic white bread and a package of generic bologna. I know you are thinking "SO WHAT?", well I know, and you are right but it makes me crazy.

She will actually buy food to EAT from the dollar store. She refuses to eat anything that is even remotely healthy and she won't even try it (and it isn't like she does it because she is poor, she just bought a 32 inch LCD TV). I'm not really sure why this is the thing that I am focusing on right now, maybe because it is easier than focusing on the fact that she was a crap mother for the last 15 or so years. I think I also partially blame her for the fact that I was fat most of my life. I know she didn't put food in my face and make me eat it, but she bought the food and it was typically crap. Once I told my husband and his brother a story that I thought was sort of funny about how when I was in high school there was about a week period where the only things edible to eat in the house were a box of fat free saltines and a crate of oranges my dad bought from some boy scouts or something. They were more horrified than amused and I realized that wasn't really a normal thing to feed your kids.

Anyway, she is here now and I have to go to her house and help her move her furniture. I am just hoping I don't end up having a seizure from all the ugly ass shit she has in her house and that she thinks is nice, for example a glittery red lobster with Christmas lights on it and a Jeep shaped cake pan she hung on the wall. Wish me luck.


creative kerfuffle said...

dude, i'm totally picturing eli's next birthday cake as a jeep! : ) i don't have any words of wisdom on the mom thing. mine is wack a doodle too but i don't think she's up my ass as much as it seems yours will be/is. holy crap. i think you and hotch are seriously going to have to find a way to set some guidelines w/ her, which i know is WAY easier said than done.

Hotch Potchery said...

I am commenting comfortably from my couch because I can not do her today.

I personally love the story of dad eating a sandwich of a white bread crust and peanut butter chips so the remaining money they had could be spent on ice cream at Busch Gardens.

I don't hate the lobster, but I don't get the cake pan.

kilax said...

I came over from your sister's blog. Yay! Another blogger with a hilarious sense of humor! I wish I could write this candidly on my blog (damn in-laws read it).

The shopping thing would IRK me to no end too. My mom raised us on crap food and she ate (still eats) too much. I am the only one who seems to overeat like her (my other siblings over spend like her). I hate it. Just hate it.

Tammie said...

i will tell what i told your sister, im so sorry you have to deal with this. while i dont have this same problem, i do have parents with issues. it sucks and it hurts. hang in there.

DAVs said...

Oh Penny.

I guffawed out loud when you said her grocery shopping choices have annoyed you for an entire week.

I hope you made it home in one piece.
PS I need to see pictures of that lobster and cake pan.

Jill said...

Isn't it weird how you don't 'get' until you are older the crappy stuff your parents did? I remember finally understanding, at the age of 33, that marrying someone, moving away, and then having your six-year-old child move in with your new husband, who has NEVER MET your child, was wrong. 33. Why did it take me so long to figure that out?

Not Your Aunt B said...

Are you sure she wasn't in my ER yesterday? Positive? She sounds like a patient I had where I had to avoid going into the room because the detail. Oh, so much detail! About everything. I thought I was going to have my head explode.

--V said...

Be afraid for me, please. I think I kind of get the cake pan on the wall. Have you ever seen those little gelatin molds made out of copper,in the shape of fish or bunches of grapes, stuff like that? Those get put on the wall as decoration. Maybe this was done to imitate that?

CK2 said...

After reading this, I have to thank my mother.

I will admit, I use to not see why she was so bad, but now? Now I can.

I'm just glad she was relatively normal Sunday, though I'm sure dad would disagree.

Shelley said...

I'm so sorry she has moved to your town...but I lol'd at your "eating the dollar store food" comment - I can't bring myself to buy food there, so I'm glad to see it's not just me!